I was looking for lyrics to a song I learned in my first chorus class* in elementary school and came across a hysterical little song sung to the tune of Oh Christmas Tree. Hee. I’m goign to have to learn this just to torment people with it.

Tom the Toad
(tune: O Christmas Tree)

Oh, Tom the toad, Oh, Tom the toad,
Why are you lying on the road?
Oh, Tom the toad, Oh, Tom the toad,
Why are you lying on the road?
You did not see the car ahead;
Now you’re all marked with tire tread.
Oh, Tom the toad, Oh, Tom the toad,
Why are you lying on the road?

Chorus:
Oh, Tom the toad, oh Tom the toad,
Why did you jump out in the road?
(repeat)

You were my friend, and now you’re dead,
You bear the marks of tire tread.
Chorus

Chorus (X2)
You did not see yon passing car,
And now you’re stretched out on the tar.
Chorus

Chorus (X2)
You hopped out to the yellow line
And turned into a streak of slime.
Chorus

Chorus (X2)
It’s clear to all you’re in a rut,
We all did see your gushing gut.
Chorus

Chorus (X2)
There was a loud and awful crash
For poor old Tom had just got smashed
Chorus

Oh Bill the bug, oh Bill the bug
What are you doing on the rug?
Oh Bill the bug, oh Bill the bug
What are you doing on the rug?
You did not see the foot ahead
And now your just a spot of red
Oh Bill the bug, oh Bill the bug
What are you doing on the rug?

Chorus (X2)
You used to hop and jump about,
And now your guts are spilling out.
Chorus

*On the same page, look for the lyrics to Senior Don Gato.

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